Babies have no sense of time. In fact, for being awake and asleep at all the wrong times they give hamsters a run for their money. The first couple of months of having a baby in the house are stressful enough, and it doesn’t help if neither of you has slept properly in days. No one can survive on no sleep, not even Batman, but there are things you can do so that each of you gets as much kip as you can.

Share the feeding

Mum might be breastfeeding, but she can express milk and store it in the fridge so there are no excuses for you not taking your turn with the occasional 4am feed. Yes, that’s right, 4am! Or if Mum’s doing the 4am feed you can do the midnight feed to let her go to bed early and get some rest.

Go to bed early

You’ll be so tired this won’t be a problem. You want to watch another episode of CSI? What do you think DVD recorders and Sky Plus were invented for? Besides, chances are you’ve seen that one before.

Get a routine

Try to get into a routine as quickly as possible. Human beings are creatures of habit and if we do something regularly our bodies soon get used to it and the lack of sleep will become more bearable.

Relax

Try to relax before bedtime. You’ll never get to sleep if you’re stressed, lying waiting for the baby to wake up. Don’t worry, if it wakes up, you’ll hear it. Have a warm bath and a warm drink (hot whisky doesn’t count).

Lay off the booze

Speaking of which, lay off the booze for a while. You might think that third glass of wine will help you sleep, but you’ll think differently when you get woken up at two in the morning. Newborns and hangovers are not friends.

Eat properly

If you’re back at work make sure you have a healthy lunch every day if possible. Avoid heavy meals that will make it a certainty that by half three in the afternoon you will be slumped over your desk drooling on your keyboard.

Get it where you can

Grab rest and sleep when it’s available. If the baby is asleep, the two of you can have a lie down too. The dishes can get done some other time. Watch out for kipping on the way to work though. Waking up with your head on the shoulder of the bloke next to you on the train is bad enough, even before you realise you’ve missed your stop and are now in France.

Have the night off

Give each other the occasional complete night off from feeding, so you get turns at going to bed early and sleeping through all night.

Get on the sofa

If you’ve got a spare room or a comfy sofa, sleep there for a couple of nights during the week if possible. You need to help her as much as possible, but no one’s going to thank you if you get fired for sleeping on the job. Then you can take over at the weekends.

Take Baby out

Even if it’s just for an hour, take Baby for a walk or to do the shopping and leave Mum to have a lie down in the afternoon. This will earn you extra Brownie points, plus you get some Daddy time.

Get Granny

Get some help with other stuff round the house for the first couple of weeks. This is where your or her parents (or both) can be invaluable, helping with housework and cooking meals to give you both a chance to rest.

While men seem to have an innate ability to be supportive partners, the modern-day dad can use a number of practical and effective tips:

1. Join your wife during doctor’s appointment. Over the next nine months or so, your pregnant partner will have a number of appointments with her doctor to check on the baby’s health. Join her! From listening to your baby’s heartbeat, to seeing the ultrasound you will be able to connect more deeply to your child and your wife.
2. Be informed. Buy or borrow a book or two about pregnancy and labour – and read them. Go to birth and breast-feeding preparation classes. Take notes and discuss questions or concerns with the doctor and mom-to-be.
3. Get involved. Don’t forget the fun and exciting parts. Create a list of possible names for your child. Go to the baby supply store and help pick out the things you’ll need for your newborn. Your wife will appreciate it and you will feel great.
4. Pamper your wife. Pregnancy can be gruelling. Make sure you are doing the vast majority of chores around the house – and still be ready to rub her feet after you’re done. You pitching in helps her stay not only physically healthy, but mentally and emotionally healthy too.
5. Go on a short holiday together. Having a newborn in your life changes it radically. Your life, and for quite a while your free time, will really never be the same again. Before your pregnant wife gets too far along in her pregnancy, try to take a short vacation where the two of you can bond as a couple.
6. Plan ahead. Create a birth plan with your wife. And be her advocate when it comes time to put that plan into action. Figure out where she wants to have the baby and whether she wants to use pain medication so you will be ready to assist her when the time comes.
7. Take time off for the day’s after your wife delivered the baby. Many employers give new fathers a few days of paternity leave. This time is important for you to get used to the new situation and you can get to know your baby and at the same time support your wife during this big change. You should be also aware that hormone levels can change a lot in new moms, leading to issues like depression.
8. Most likely, your wife’s pregnancy and labour will go well. But it’s wise to be prepared if things don’t go according to plan. Miscarriage is always a possibility, and it’s good to learn beforehand that a man and woman will typically feel and show the resulting grief in different ways. Be there for her and let her know that you grieve too, even though you may show it differently.

Bringing a baby into the world is a lot of work, but it yields some of the deepest and most intense experiences life has to offer. So follow the suggestions above, and when you hear that child first utter the word “daddy,” you’ll know you deserved it.

1. Take your time to warm up and focus on foreplay. No need to rush. Pushing your wife to have sex before her mind and body are ready will harm your relationship.
2. A great way to have fun is to shower together! Or bathe together. Not only will it save time and money for water but you might enjoy the setting.
3. Discuss birth control. Don’t be someone who is caught two months after the birth of your baby wondering if your wife got pregnant because both of you took a chance.
4. Try to plan some time alone for the two of you, even if it’s just to cuddle. Having a baby may leave you feeling “touched out,” but some special cozy time with your partner can help revive that, even before sexual intercourse is allowed or wanted.
5. Life with a baby is different; different for both of you. Get to know each other a bit better. Remember you both have to adjust your life to being parents, even if it’s not your first child.
6. Be spontaneous! Bedtime might not always be the right time. Nor will the bedroom always be the right place. Add some spice to your sex life, act like a teenager!
7. Lubrication! Make sure you and your partner take enough time to get into the mood. If you think you need some more help than what Mother Nature is providing, be sure to use an over the counter lubricant rather than worry needlessly. If you’re still concerned talk to your practitioner.
8. Go for quality not quantity. Having sex every night or every week should not be an objective. Figure out what timing is right for you, your wife and your relationship.
9. Invite your wife to talk about any fears of sexual intercourse she may have. Maybe she is worried about the repair of an episiotomy or stitches or the recent images of delivering a baby.
10. Accept that your wife may say ‘no’. This has nothing to do with loving you less or finding you less attractive. Sometimes the moment is just not there. There are also compromises that can be made along the way. Maybe intercourse is out but some good old-fashioned kissing and touching may be OK?

1. Fevers. The rule for babies is if his or her rectal temperature is more than 37,8ºC for a 0 to 3 month baby or more than 38,3ºC for a 3 to 6 month old baby, call the doctor. Also, if the baby has a fever of any level and his or her behavior is unusual, call.
2. Not Hungry. If the baby won’t eat for two consecutive feedings, it’s a good warning sign. Babies can’t sustain long periods without food or water without the risk of dehydration.
3. Moods. This is a tough one because babies are often moody by nature. But if your baby is dull or unresponsive to people, sights or sounds, it is an indicator of trouble.
4. Breathing. All babies breathe, and sometimes in unique ways. But if you notice repeated, unusually rapid or heavy breathing, you should call a doctor.
5. Digestive Stuff. If your baby has 3 or more episodes of vomiting or diarrhea, or if there is blood in baby’s vomit or stool, it is time to make a call. Lots of vomiting and diarrhea are the cause of dehydration, and blood in vomit or stool can mean lots of things, none of them good. If your child has eaten or ingested any medication, household product or foreign object, you should call.
6. Crying. All babies cry, but if he or she is crying continuously and uncontrollably for 2 or more hours, there is definitely something wrong.
7. Accidents. If the baby has suffered a burn or other serious injury, call the doctor. Babies don’t react to things like older children do, and a burn, sprain, large bruise or other injury can be pretty dangerous if not treated promptly.
8. When in doubt; make the call. Even if your gut just tells you something is wrong, it is better to be safe than sorry. One of the biggest responsibilities of a dad is to protect his child from avoidable problems, and calling the pediatrician can be the best thing you can do when you don’t know what else to do.

1. Don’t be too proud or embarrassed to sing softly and even talk to your baby. The sound of your voice is very reassuring to your baby and it is part of the bonding process. Your baby will quickly learn to associate your voice with safety and security.
2. Gentle bouncing works sometimes. But be careful not to bounce your baby too much or you may upset your baby’s tummy.
3. Pacifiers work too. Some babies find comfort in a pacifier. Others refuse to accept it especially if your wife is breastfeeding.
4. Breastfeeding mothers need help. Fathers can’t sit back and relax! If your wife is breastfeeding she will love you more for taking the time to get up and bring your baby to her. It seems like a small thing now, but at 3 a.m. in the morning it’s a beautiful gesture.
5. Take shifts with your wife. Agree before you go to bed at night which of you will get up with the baby first. It might help to simply pick even and odd hours. For example, if the baby wakes up during the 11pm, 1am, 3am, 5am hours then you get up. If it’s during the 12am, 2am, 4am, 6am hours then your wife will wake up with the baby. It helps to have a plan before you go to sleep at night. This will prevent the anger and frustration of the moment when neither one of you wants to get up.
6. Learn the different ways your baby likes to be held. Some like to be held chest to chest. Others like to be cradled. And still others like to be seated facing away from you. Find the position that your baby feels most comfortable in try soothing them in that position.
7. Rocking, either in a chair or in the bassinet, can also be helpful means of helping ease your baby back to sleep.
8. Pacing the floor can be very soothing to some babies. In fact some babies will transition from a “deathly scream” to silence if you put him or her chest to chest with the head on your shoulder and simply start pacing the room. While pacing the room you’ll discover dents and spots that you had never noticed before.
9. Placing a warm heating pad in your babies cradle before bed time can ease the transition when laying baby down for the first time at night. NOTE: The heating pad should never be left in the cradle with your baby.
10. A warm bath in a baby tub can also be a great way to soothe your baby before bedtime. It’s important that you have a towel to wrap your baby in right away after the bath. This will eliminate him or her from getting cold.

1. Massage her face; this may help to relax her and release stress.
2. Remind her to go to the bathroom every hour. A full bladder is both uncomfortable as well as a slowing factor during labor.
3. Labor is exhausting. If the doctor allows it, encourage her to drink and eat something to replenish her energy.
4. Try a cool wet cloth for her face and neck. Gently washing her face can make her feel refreshed while she’s working so hard.
5. Water in labor can relieve different pains. Try the shower or bath.
6. Apply a heat pad, warm rice sock or blanket to her lower back, legs and hips.
7. Help her to change positions in order to encourage the progress of labor.
8. Give her counterpressure if her back is hurting. Press with your hands where, when and how hard she wants it.
9. Just be there for her. Be near to help her when she needs it, even if she doesn’t want to be touched. It is important for her to know that you are there for her.
10. Remind her why she is doing all this: your baby!

Tips:

1. Grab towels or shirts to wrap mom and baby up if possible. If in a car look for emergency blanket.
2. Cutting the cord can cause mom and/or baby to bleed and removes source of oxygen for baby.
3. Having mom breastfeed reduces the amount of blood she loses.